i don’t like when people use the description of “bad” to describe something that’s subjective. take ‘bud light’ for example. don’t call ‘bud light’ bad. your bud light was almost certainly not “bad”. you may have disliked it, but it tastes exactly how the brewers intended it to taste. ABI (anheuser busch inbev) brewers are absurdly good at brewing consistent beer…they’d put any craft brewers to shame in the quality department, which is as much about consistency as anything else. you may not enjoy that particular beverage, bud light, but it’s exactly what they intended to make and that product is exactly what millions of people are looking for.
cambria and i were walking around in the seaport today when we passed this place called FUKU. i’m aware of chef david chang and momofuku and a huge sucker for fast casual. and fried chicken. cambria mentioned to me that our friends had told her that they’d tried it and it was bad.
i, of course, had to launch into my “why we don’t describe subjective things as bad” speech. credit to cambria, i have a lot of these types of speeches and she just let me do my thing. we eventually went in and i got a fried chicken sandwich.
...it was bad. fuck! i don’t know. i’m so confused. i guess their thing is using dark meat, which i love. less prone to get dry, good flavor, what’s not to love? but this sandwich was damn bad. it was so tough that each bite i had to gnaw my teeth back and forth just to get a bite off. it was dry and stringy and had that overly game-y flavor chicken gets when you reheat it. i threw it out. i actually spit the piece i was chewing on into the trash can as well. i am absolutely astounded at how bad this sandwich was. is it me? i walked by later and there was a monster line. what am i missing? i am so confused. i’m definitely picky about quality, but i’ll also eat old garbage out of my car if necessary. i have a pretty low tolerance for bad food. i eat chicken mcnuggets. in fact, i kinda love mcnuggets. it's been a real derek zoolander "who am i" moment that i’m having.
what’s the point of this? well, i really wanted to know what part of this chicken i’m missing. maybe this is a new style i don’t know about yet? so i went to their website to reach out and learn more. but they don’t have any way to contact them. remember, this is a fancy-ass, trendy-ass, celebrity chef-ass restaurant group. with no contact!! are you serious? c’mon man. i had to tell someone, so here we are.